John Amaechi - My Black Gay Hero

I've always been a big sports fan. As a kid growing up in Roosevelt, Long Island some of my fondest memories was practicing my baseball pitching and catching with my dad in our backyard. I always loved when we'd watch football and basketball games whenever we got the chance. My dad was an amatuer boxer before I was born and my mom talked him out of it. He was a Mets/Knicks/Nets fan. I'm now a big Yankee's fan. I often joke with my friends that Derek Jeter is my next husband [oh, how I WISH that photo below of the two of us wasn't "embellished" with Photoshop] he doesn't know it yet.

Growing up, I guess I knew was gay. But how could that be when I liked sports? I mean, that's so unstereotypical for a gay guy to be into contact sports. Right? Gay men are supposed to be into figure skating as far as sports go. Right? Well I'm not saying that I would kick Rudy Galindo out of bed, but I happen to like watching the Superbowl too! (And not just because they played in the rain and their suits where getting soaking wet either!) What it comes down to is that it just goes to show that you can't judge a book by its cover. So for a long time I kept my love of sports from my gay friends and kept my love of men from my straight male friends. But how could I be a whole person with all of my friends if I lived in the closet with so much?

Once I grew up and realized that there ARE many men who are both gay AND big sports fans. It only made me wonder if there were in fact, professional players who were gay as well. Gradually as the years went on there were Dave Kopay, Greg Louganis (although swimming technically doesn't count because it's not a "contact" sport) and countless female athletes. But for the first time I can remember, do we have a Black man, John Amaechi, who is coming out so soon after leaving the NBA. Roy Simmons came out many years after leaving the NFL.

No one even seemed to be too bent (no pun intended) by Pro Wrestler, Orlando Jordan coming out a few months back. I guess this was because he said he is "Bi". So in the eyes of many straight fans, "There's still a chance". Although I'm not a big pro wrestling fan (although I've had a crush on "The Rock" for years), I do know it's more theatrical then say, a boxing match. But just the same, it was a big step for Orlando Jordan to come out too.

I believe this is a really big step because so many straight brothas out there would question the ability of a player who was not only a brotha and a skillful ball player but who is also gay. Mostly the thought of a gay man sharing a locker room with them scares them. Especially someone who (in their eyes) is just a "regular brotha". NEWSFLASH to all the straight men out there: We all don't want to "convert" straight guys! We are not all checking out your asses either! Amaechi has said in interviews since coming out that he was never attracted to any of his past teammates because when he was on the boards it was just a business. I know EXACTLY what he means!

Since I've never made it a big secret about being gay, it amazes me how many seemingly intelligent straight men will question my motives when I so much as say "wassup" in the break room at jobs that I've had. Even at school now, this happens to me. I'm a big guy who is not flamboyant so when I tell people I'm gay, the guys instantly freeze up. I even overheard two guys talking about me saying "but he doesn't look gay?" Sometimes I even question the reason for my being fired may have been because I wasn't part of the "all-boy" network at my last position in corporate America. But I digress. I think that Amaechi's coming out will hopefully let sports fans see that many players may not always play on their "team" but can still win for THE team.

I only hope by John Amaechi and Orlando Jordan coming out will make it easier for other professional Black male athletes to feel comfortable to come out while they are still in the middle of their sports careers rather than wait to retire to do it. If a person is a good player it shouldn't matter who they sleep with outside of the playing field. But ultimately it's up to the fans to support their teams regardless of whether or not there may be one gay player on the team.

I also hope it makes it easier for high school athletes to not be afraid of whom they are. If they are gay and want to play organized sports, then they should without any judgments. I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's important that the door has been open, now it's time to dialogue on how to make the team work to win. It shouldn't matter if someone is a Yankees or Red Sox fan and is gay. [Although I would equate dating a Red Sox fan to dating a Bush supporter: not going to happen in my lifetime.] Our money is still green and we still go to support our teams. Who gives a crap if one of the players is playing in a "different league"? I certainly don't.

One of my favorite books is a novel called "The Dreyfus Affair" by Peter Lefcourt. It's a love story set in the world of Major League Baseball. A white shortstop falls for his Black second baseman and so the story begins. Since it came out, there have been talks of making it into a film. I'd hope with the success of "Brokeback Mountain" in 2005, that "The Dreyfus Affair" would finally get the green light. Like the rugged characters in "Brokeback", the world of baseball is a very testosterone-infused environment. But would straight guys be freaked out that guys, who look like them, are into sports like them, and scratch and fart just like them are suddenly falling into other guy’s arms? I sure hope they do.

There will always be people like Tim Hardaway and his foul comments about his fellow brother of the courts. To the straight guys out there (and I know there are a few reading this now): We are everywhere. We play sports like you. We drink beer like you. With the exception of who we love, we are not that different. If you happen to have a favorite player who you find out is gay, it doesn't make you "weak" or any less of a man because you like him. If anything it makes your more of a man to stand by your favorite team and ALL of it's players. We're not going anywhere. So GET OVER IT!